Making Me Crazy

He's making me crazy.

Like cuckoo. Psycho, schizophrenic crazy. One minute I want him to fall off the face of the earth, the next minute I'm wistfully wishing he would call me, then I'm calling him, he's not answering (or calling/texting me back) and then I am super sad and just want to eat ice cream in my room and watch Sex and the City the movie and cry.

See? I'm crazy.

I just don't understand him at all. And when it comes to him, I don't understand me at all.

What am I going to do to get over this man? I am a pitiful wreck. I write mean, cryptic statuses and heartfelt Facebook notes practically crying my eyes out through the screen. The next minute, I want to be best friends with him. I'm like, give me something, give me ANYTHING!

I called him today and he didn't answer....and he hasn't called me back. Granted, it's only been an hour but I get the distinct feeling that he ignored my phone call. I thought about just calling him over and over and over until he answered. I would never do that though. I'm not that crazy.

Plus what do I want with him for real? He's a mess. He is never going to be the guy for me and I shouldn't even want a guy like that anywhere near my life much less talking to me in my ear or in my face. I haven't talked to him since the "earring episode" on Saturday. And I think it was better when he wasn't calling me, but now I'm humiliated because I broke down and called him and he hasn't called me back.

Doesn't he want to talk to me? Doesn't he care at all? Of course not. I really, really, really need to get myself together. I miss him so much.

I MISS HIM SO MUCH.

Why doesn't he like me? Why doesn't he give me the time of day? I am devastated. Still. I've gotta get over this. I am never, ever, ever, for as long as I live, calling or texting him again. If I see him (and he hasn't called me back), I'm not talking to him either.

I am SO UPSET.